Chicago to Boston to Chicago

Sunday, December 31, 2006


New Year's Eve.

Arnie and his roommate Young decided to have a party. We spent the majority of the day cleaning and setting up. Young wanted to make a champagne glass pyramid and pour a champagne waterfall before midnight, but the plastic glasses didn't look like they could withstand the decadence.

Arnie wanted to put a paperweight in front of the pyramid as decoration.

Young: What if we put Space Ghost in front of the pyramid instead?

Space Ghost won.

Saturday, December 30, 2006


Firecracker reunion!

Tonight we got to perform together at the Playground for the first time in a looong time. Afterwards we went to Stacey's for drinks. Just the girls....and Arnie.

There was a lot of catching up to do. We talked a lot about work, new projects, family, and of course, boyfriends. It got a bit awkward for Arnie, listening to the girls dish about times they are mad at their boyfriends, or nice things they do, or plans for the future. I just listened and did my best to move to another topic when it felt like it was my turn to include my observations on my relationship. Arnie didn't really chime in either, except once:

Stacey: It's just nice because Bob is the first guy to ever tell me I'm beautiful.

Me: I don't know what that's like.

Arnie: And you never will.

Fun night.

Friday, December 29, 2006


Tonight I got to perform with Cowlick at the Playground again.

Me: Look like you are having a really interesting conversation about something.

We usually have interesting conversations about Shelby's boobs.

Thursday, December 28, 2006


Arnie was still in Ohio visiting his family when I got in town on Christmas Eve. I was surprised to find my Christmas gifts on his bed, which included a stuffed bear and a note saying he thought the bear might be hokey but I could take it back to Boston and when I felt lonely I could hug it and think of him. I guess that's what stuffed animals are for; a receptacle for hugs when the people you love are not around.

Then I went into the family room and found Arnie's Christmas gift to himself. A giant 56 inch flat screen TV. I called him that night and let him know that I got in safe, and saw all the new things.

Arnie: I didn't tell you about the TV cause I wanted it to be a surprise and to see what you think!

This is a very 'boy' thing to do, I think. Surprise! Aren't you surprised at my new TV? Look! A new TV! I suppose it satiates a primal hunting nature....and a love for HD.

Me: You do realize that you have a social responsibility now. You have to have people over to watch football every weekend.

Arnie: No, people can get their own giant TV!

Me: What about the Superbowl?

Arnie: Maybe.

Tonight we tried to find a good movie to watch on the giant TV and decided on Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. It was pretty awesome.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006


I didn't stay at The Knickerbocker with the girls last night, but I did meet them at the hotel the next day for shopping and high tea.

Peggy: You missed the best part of the trip. Last night Julie and I hear an "AHHHHH!!!" and we go into Gram's room and she's just on the floor. It was hilarious. I took a picture of it.

Gram: I tripped on the bed.

Me: (looking at the picture) It looks like you're doing ballet.

Gram: That was just for effect.

And later:

Peggy: We didn't take any pictures last night. Julie do you want me to take a picture of your butt?

Julie: Yes.

Peggy: Wait, take a picture of my butt first.

Tuesday, December 26, 2006


A few years back my Grandma started a 'girls’ night out' post holiday trip, which is now considered tradition. Although I don't know how long you have to repeat something for it to become a tradition...but we consider it one anyway. Basically she takes all her girls downtown (not everyone could make it this year) for movie and a nice dinner, we stay overnight at the Knickerbocker Hotel, the next day we go shopping on Michigan Avenue, and then we have high tea at The Drake. It's nice for my aunts because they get a night away from their kids, and I get to pretend like I'm a tourist in my own city.

So we catch up, talk about movies, and the conversation usually devolves into parenting and kids in general.

Julie: Sarah, you are turning 28 on January 8th. It's time to start thinking about the future.

Peggy: What are you talking about? She's turning 25 on the 8th; you have all the time in the world.

Julie: Yeah, I guess you’re still pretty young. God, you're a long way away from being our age. Just wait till you're like us!

Peggy: Yeah, has been's.

I'm looking forward to turning 27 on January 4th.

Monday, December 25, 2006



Christmas Day with my Grandparents.

Grandma: Look at what my husband got me for Christmas. Two pewter roosters that look like they are fighting.

Grandpa: After 50 Christmas' together you have to get creative.

Grandma: I love them. They remind me of the first picture I bought on our first trip to France. (She pulls this picture off the wall of a red rooster in a red frame.) Remember what you got me for our first Christmas? It was this tiny cashmere yellow sweater. It was obscene. I dyed it black, but even then I couldn't wear it. He bought it off a woman's back, you know.

Grandpa: Back then I was working on Michigan Avenue and they had this great little clothing store where men would go in after work, drink, smoke cigars, and the waitresses were wearing the clothes you could buy. It looked good on her, so I figured it would look good on you. And it did.

Grandma: Yeah, she was wearing the sweater and her underwear that was it. I could never wear that thing in public.

Grandpa: Who said you had to?

Merry Christmas.

Sunday, December 24, 2006


I woke up this morning at 8:40am. My flight to Chicago left at 7:00am.

Got to the airport at 9:00am and was put on a flight for 8:00pm and told I was on the stand by list for every flight going to Chicago. A flight left about every hour and a half.

It was my fault from over sleeping but this didn't stop me from silently crying at the counter every time I watched an airplane fill up with excited passengers. There were a handful of people in my position, and we would crowd around the gate during every boarding anxiously waiting for our names to be called. After two planes left a man approached me and we began to make small talk. Both of us knew we would be stuck here for a while, and he didn't seem like he was going to kill me or ask for my number, so we decided to pass the time together. It turned out he was originally from Africa and moved to Boston to get his masters in mental disorders. Now he works with the mentally handicapped.

Me: I feel horrible for yelling at that woman at the ticket counter.

Him: It's ok, you have a right to be angry. But even when you were angry or when you were cry, I can tell you are joyful person.

With his African accent this somehow sounded wise.

8 hours later we got on a flight.

Him: Well we are not sitting together but may I have your telephone number so I may say hello to you?

I did make it to Christmas Eve with my family. Just in time to watch the kids sing Christmas songs, eat cold ham, and go to bed.

Saturday, December 23, 2006


One last dinner with Doug before I head home.

With the New Year approaching we started talking about the future and what it has in store for us.

Me: If I ever became boring would you tell me?

Doug: Yes. But let me preface this by saying, when you have kids, you definitely become boring.

Me: That's not true. I know a lot of non-boring people who have kids.

Doug: Bullshit. Children are whores. They are the whores of commitment and they will make you boring.

Me: So you don't plan on having any?

Doug: No. They just don't fit within my lifestyle. Now pass me my Speedo and martini.

Friday, December 22, 2006


Stacey P. and Chet had their baby. It's a boy. Ryan Crosby.

Stacey has already started working and is bringing the baby to the office. I still have yet to meet him though. Rumors have already begun that the baby has been put to work.

Congratulations.

Thursday, December 21, 2006


Aaaaaannnnnd...more temp work. Freaking holidays.

Some employees on the 11th floor decided to go carolling throughout the building. One man wanted to perfect the choreography to 'The Twelve Days of Christmas' so they stood in a circle and practiced and each day of Christmas had a specfic move. 'Seven Swans a' Swimming' looked less like swans and more like the moves from 'Walk Like an Egyptian.'

Wednesday, December 20, 2006


Rachel and Doug hosted a holiday bingo party tonight. Everyone brought gag gifts for bingo prizes. Doug's gag gift? A homemade gag.

After winning for the second time I received a small gift bag full of condoms. They were not in a box, clearly ripped out of an economy box, and sticky to the touch. I politely thanked the gift giver and excused myself to the bathroom to wash my hands.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006


I could post a picture of myself to show how excited I am to be in Chicago in less than a week, but I like this one...plus I don't have a party hat.

Monday, December 18, 2006


More temp work today.

While answering phones a person called asking to speak with Mr. Porter. It's a fairly common name; it was also my last name for the first seven years of my life. When Jesse and I were adpoted we decided, after our grandparents delicately brought it up the subject, to change our last names to _____. It made us feel more like thier own children.

I'm used to telling this story as I get to know people, but I haven't had to do it in a while. I guess I haven't really made any new friends in the last couple years. But now, in a city where no one knows me, at a job where I'm making new friends, I've had to tell it more than a few times.

After transferring the call to Mr. Porter I wondered 'what if my name were still Porter?' Sarah Porter. It rolls of the tongue nicely, maybe better than my own last name. But either way it was nice to have choice, even at a young age, to open a new chapter of my life, and close the other.

Sunday, December 17, 2006


Tonight Taylor hosted a D&D (Drinks and Desserts) Holiday Party.

Jeremy whipped up a dessert, a layered concoction of twinkies, bailey's liquer, cool whip, and marshmallows. He didn't have a name for it so people spent a good portion of the night giving it a name. The crowd favorites were 'White Trash Tiramisu' or 'Jeramisu.'

Saturday, December 16, 2006


A Christmas gift from Taylor.

Taylor: My Grandfather made these wooden decorations by hand. He works on them year round. This year he had made over a thousand.

Taylor's grandfather passed away a few months ago, when I had first moved to Boston. She was very close to him. I remember when someone asked what she would miss most, she replied 'Just talking to him.'

Giving us these very personal representations of her Grandfather made her very happy, and she picked them out specifically for each of us. This santa was vaguely 'foreign,' which reminded her of a character I play in the show.

Thank you Taylor, this was my favorite part of today.

Friday, December 15, 2006


More temp work today.

With my ever changing schedule I only take one or two day assignments sporadically, so I've been at a lot of different offices. Today I worked for the City of Boston as a receptionist. I was told that if the mayor called I had to run, literally RUN, to the other side of the office and grab anyone who was there. I got the feeling that the only right way to do this was frantically. Thankfully he never called.

In the small women's bathroom there was only dawn dish soap and some crusty paper towels for washing your hands. I decided to take a picture of it and maybe blog about the difference between this bathroom and the one in another office I worked in a week before. It was a Fortune 100 company and I was filling in for the executive assistant to the CEO. The bathroom had chestnut-ginger soap and hand lotion, cloth towels, and soft lighting.

But as I was crouching down to sink level and aiming my camera a woman walked in and caught me. I pretended like I had pulled the wrong thing out of my purse (lip gloss and cameras can feel the same when you're digging in a purse, right?) and then looked at my camera as though I was surprised it was broken. I left the office as quickly as I could, afraid that the mayor would be called and escort me out himself.

Thursday, December 14, 2006


A voicemail from my younger brother Jesse:

Hey Sarah it's Jesse. Ummm...I was just calling cause I had a question for you. Ummm...I'm in a dilemma. I don't know what to buy Courtney for Christmas. I wanna a girl's input who's around the same age and you would be perfect. So, you know...I don't know how much to spend, what to go for, and... it's kinda like our one year anniversary too...on New Year's....so it's kinda like a, kinda like soo...ummm...you know, you know...dating for a year...you've done that....so uh...how much to spend. Just want your input. Thanks.

This message surprised me because Jesse had a girlfriend for a long time before he started dating Courtney. He should know how to buy gifts for girlfriends by now, right? Of course I still don't know what to get Arnie.

And then it dawned on me. Jesse and I have both had two relationships in the last six years. Our previous relationships started at the same time, and ended at the same time. Our current relationships began within two months of each other. I have no conclusions to draw from this...but I do find it strange.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006


Some art goes right over my head.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006


Me: I have secret...I started reading 'Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.' I don't know why I'm keeping it a secret, but on page 60 it says that you should tell someone that you're reading the book...so I'm telling you. It may be a way to sell more books.

And later:

Me: I started whitening my teeth.

Freaking holidays.

Monday, December 11, 2006


If I could take better pictures you would be able to see Lovie Smith celebrating Devin Hester's second kick off return touchdown. Damn. And if I could move the laptop before I take pictures you would be able to see that the Christmas tree has found a home on the floor next to the television.

Sunday, December 10, 2006


Homesick. Freaking holidays.

Saturday, December 09, 2006


Christmas shopping.

While I was trying on jeans at the Gap (it's important to get yourself Christmas gifts too) Doug had a run with a few men who were, according to Doug, waaay cracked out. It started when Doug saw one stuff some shirts in his jacket.

Doug: Can you give me those two shirts you just took?

Crackhead 1: uhhhh......(gives Doug the shirts and walks out)

Crackhead 2: You work here?

Doug: Yes.

Crackhead 2: You better fucking work here.

The employees seemed busy so Doug just stood behind the counter, holding a hat, and pretended to be working.

Friday, December 08, 2006


Apparently Chicago was the site of a 'terrorist' plot...according to MSNBC.com.

Thursday, December 07, 2006


An early morning text message from Doug.

'Make sure to grab a Metro today and check page 21'

The caption underneath the picture says:

'No, give me improvisational comedy, not improvisational angry.'

I guess the Metro doesn't realize that we're the cool kids of comedy.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006


The back is feeling a lot better but I'm still limited in movement and the past couple of days have left me couch/bed ridden. On an upside, it gave me a chance to read more, catch up on TV, and listen to the mix tape Bob gave me on Thanksgiving.

Being a permanent fixture on the couch has also given me time to catch up with Callahan. Tonight he was very excited to go to his first guitar lesson with a new teacher, a 'Turkish dude with some crazy electric guitars.' He came home from the lesson pretty jazzed and started practicing.

Me: How did it go?

Callahan: Good! Did any of my groupies call?

Me: Uh, no.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Bad day but I did have cookies and milk. That was pretty good.

Monday, December 04, 2006


In the last few years I've had problems with my back. Fortunately I worked for a Chiropractor so the pain never lasted long. Even when I moved on to another job Dr. Ron would still work on me whenever I needed it. This picture was taken in his office a week before I moved.

Last night while cleaning, I tried to pick up a heavy box and threw out my low back. I immediately started icing it, knowing that the real pain doesn't set in until the next day, and hoped for the best.

I woke up this morning and could barely move. Couldn't walk, couldn't sit, couldn't stand…bad news. I found a Chiropractor in the North End and set up an appointment. In my fragile state I forgot to ask some important questions and upon arrival I knew I made a mistake. It was clear that this doctor only worked on little old ladies and might not have the strength to work on me. His first words were 'You’re too young for this.' Great...thanks.

Old Lady: Doc, me and my husband bought cemetery plots today.

Dr: For you or him?

Old Lady: Both of us. We're going to kill each other....HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Dr: Where did you get them?

Old Lady: In that big Italian cemetery in St. Michael's. His German ancestry is not happy about it...HAHAHAHAHAHA.....too bad.

I walked out of there in the same condition as when I walked in. I put on my ipod and started gingerly shuffling down the cold street. A classic 'feel sorry for yourself' song came on and I just started crying. Crying and shuffling and sniffling. It was pathetic.

I emailed Dr. Ron and he referred me to a guy he knows, who also happens to be the Chiropractor for the Boston Red Sox. I suppose if this guy is strong enough to work on David Ortiz, he can work on me too.

Sunday, December 03, 2006


Callahan brought home a Christmas tree and a pine scented candle. Strangely, I also brought home a plant from Ikea. It's a money tree. His name is Blagden Phosphorus III.

I don't know if it's the greenery or that fact that were getting a new roommate tomorrow, but it put us both in the mood to clean. Afterwards Callahan lit the new pine candle; an olfactory pat on the back for a job well done.

Callahan: The person at the store said this was going to smell like Christmas! This doesn't smell like Christmas! What the fuck.

Saturday, December 02, 2006


Cowlick celebrated 'A Very Cowlick Christmas' this weekend.

This is a tradition that started three years ago. We go to Martin's condo in Door County for the weekend and drink, play cards, play catch phrase or guesstures, go swimming, eat a lot of food, exchange secret santa gifts, and never get out of our pajamas.

This was the gift I got last year from Scott, who works at Playboy. It's a box of lingerie, clearly made for people with Playboy model bodies. Most of it is still in the packaging. Oh, and Tim took this photo last year and sent it to me...I'm a picture pirate.

When I got home from the Midnight Show I called them. We talked a little bit about what they had done and we played 'The Cowlick Game' (which is just a version of 'who's most likely to') while I was on speaker phone.

After I got off the phone I felt far away and quickly devolved into a very childish mood.
'This is no fair (that I chose to move to Boston.) I want to be there right now (even though it's impossible.) Why can I transport myself and just be there (but I have a job here that I have a responsibility to.) This sucks (right now.)'

Friday, December 01, 2006


Ikea.

Doug: I want this couch, should I buy it?

Me: No. First, you don't even know if you can get it into your apartment. Second, what if you move into a condo in the next few years and it doesn't fit in that place. You'll be devastated.

Doug: So you're saying I should wait five years to buy this couch?

Me: Yes.

Later Doug bought a few pieces of furniture in this exact display.

Me: So are you just buying all the other pieces, so that you'll feel forced to eventually buy the couch because it's the only thing that will match?

Doug: Yes.

And later:

Doug: Should I get these curtains for the living room? Have you seen the rug in there?

Me: Yes, but the drapes don’t necessarily have to match….oh God. Forget it.